Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Randomize
