How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize