I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
