I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
