how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
