she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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