My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Randomize
