I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
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