Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
You ruined the universe
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
