Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
