I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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