I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
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