their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize