I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
