She is in my trunk
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
