If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
vagina is talking i cant
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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