question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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