is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Randomize
