you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
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