I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize
