I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Randomize
