so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
