I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
