handjob tips. give me some.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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