talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
