This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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