I hate all girls vehemently.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Randomize
