I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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