So drunk, too bad you don't want this
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
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