i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize