my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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