Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
