i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
