i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
he was CRYING into my vagina
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
