You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
