Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
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