My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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