JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
