i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
