Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
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