I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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