Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
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