The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Randomize
