its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
two words...techno handjob
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
