Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
