He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
