We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
