its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
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