To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
