Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Panties = found
Randomize
