the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
A+ Viking dick
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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