The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
