Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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